Do you think I'm being ungrateful? Is it wrong to feel this way?
I'm in my senior year of high school and even though it's just the beginning, there is already a lot of stuff coming up that is going to cost major money. I have three older siblings who are now in there mid to late twenties and no longer live at home. My family would be considered middle class. My stepfather is one of the bigger managers at a grocery store (I don't know what his "official title" is) and my mom works part time as a nurse. I don't ask for a lot of stuff. I usually feel really uncomfortable asking for things, I'm not really sure why. At my school there are a whole bunch of graduation trips. One of them is to Paris, France another to somewhere in Switzerland. The one I really want to go to is to New York. It's for four days and you get to go see two Broadway shows and go to all the museums, and other tourist stuff. It's going to be around $600-700, plus lunch money for each day and spending money. My parents say I probably can't go because it is expensive. I understand it is a lot of money, but I feel really... I don't know what the word is. It's just all of my brothers and sisters got to go on graduation trips (my sister went to Nunavut, and I can't remember where my brothers went) and that was back when my Mom was a single mother. I'm trying to get a job to pay for it myself, but everywhere I apply isn't hiring or has already filled the position, etc. Another thing is I can't go to university I want to go to, not because it's a fancy, prestigious, expensive university, but because it isn't in my home town and therefore my parents won't have enough money. But, they paid for most of my sister and one of brothers tuition, and both of them constantly switched programs (which added costs) and my brother ended up dropping out and my sister took a break because she got pregnant (she's married, don't worry). They also paid all the fees for university applications three or four times for my other brother, and he ended up not going and getting addicted to drugs. I feel like it's wrong for me to feel this way, but at the same time, I just feel like all my brothers and sisters were given tons of opportunities to go the universities they wanted and the trips and stuff and I'm not. I know things are really expensive (otherwise I'd just pay for them myself) and costs have gone up, times are harder, my parents have other things the need to pay for, etc, etc. And that really I should contribute (I try, but I don't really have any money, because I can't get a job) and that I'm lucky to even have the chance to go to university... I'm just, I don't know. I feel gipped, kind of :S (Sorry this is so long, I ramble)
Family - 2 Answers
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1 :
If they gave your bros and sis all that help and you usually don't ask for much, they should allow you to go. I hope you can go, I love NYC.
2 :
Two big questions - one about a senior trip to NYC and another about university costs. Keep in mind that the world wide economy is now terrible compared to just a few years ago when your siblings were your age. Reports about the economy are in the news on a daily basis so you are probably aware of how bad it is. This has nothing to do with your mom and stepdad wanting or not wanting to send you someplace, it's a financial reality. Is your biological father available to help? If so, ask him for some assistance - maybe matching funds if you earn part of the money for the trip. Jobs are not plentiful right now. Most jobs that were historically held by teens (fast food, part time shop work) have now been taken by adults who are supporting their families. Still, it doesn't mean jobs are not available. Get creative. You can do the standby babysitting work - even a regular after school or Saturday sitting job for someone in the neighborhood. It could mean sacrificing some social activity but at least you would have the job and income. Walk dogs, have a yard sale, paint or do yard work for your neighbors. Do computer input for people who are less savvy - including correspondence or accounting - QuickBooks Accounting is an easy program. A few hours of data input a day in a small office would help you as well as the business owner. It would also give you another job skill. As far as university expenses, financial assistance, scholarships and grants are available and not just based on your academic background. Check out CLEP, the College Level Examination Program. Talk to your high school adviser about the program or look on line. It will save you hundreds or even thousands of dollars in tuition and book expenses and it will save you many class room hours because you can test out of electives. I tested out of 15 hours and my brother tested out of 27 hours. That was equivalent to a semester for me and almost two for my brother. That is also a lot of saved tuition. Think hard about attending a junior or community college for the first two years. In the U.S. most JCs work closely with state universities to transfer all credits to a four year program. You could live at home, work, attend school and sock away some money for the last two and most important years of your degree program. You will also have a better understanding of where you want your life to go. Don't discount the military either. Depending on your country, you may be able to have the government pay for your education, in full, in exchange for your service. Most of all, talk to your siblings, parents and stepdad. They may have untapped information to share. Good luck.
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